Redemption
by donnag76
Summary: Tony works to cure Pepper of the Extremis virus. Standard disclaimers apply. I don't own any of these cool people. Marvel does. Review, please! Happy reading!
1. Chapter 1

**Redemption**

Chapter 1

_Tony, make it stop!_

Tony Stark sat up with a start, gasping for breath. The dream was so real, like always. He scrubbed a weary hand across his face. He had fallen asleep at his desk again and sleep was something he couldn't afford to do. Turning in his chair, he looked to where Pepper lay asleep in their bed. That was why he _couldn't_ stop. Each time he felt like the task of decoding Extremis was too hard, one look was his reminder to keep going.

_Tony, make it stop!_

The scene was just as fresh in Tony's mind as the day he saw it projected in Killian's dungeon. He could hear the clacking of the metal balls rolling on the floor. The picture of Pepper strapped down, an IV full of the sinister liquid in her, was all too vivid. Aldrich Killian took perverse pleasure in showing the ghastly image. The video feed had no sound, but Tony could read her lips. The tears in her eyes mirrored his own. He knew how her voice sounded, so in his brain, he could hear her screams, every desperate word.

_Tony, make it stop!_

It was his fault. Like a fool, he called out a terrorist and Pepper paid for it. But, he would right his wrong. He was Tony Stark and he vowed to fix the problem, to fix Pepper, if it took everything he had. He rubbed bloodshot eyes, picked up his pencil, and looked at his work so far. The desk was covered with every scrap of research he could get his hands on about the Extremis virus. For some reason, he thought of this genius mathematician in a movie he and Pepper once watched. Tony had scoffed at the idea of someone filling page upon page of a notebook with some formula that would change the world. The idea didn't sound nearly as ludicrous now. He flipped through the three dozen or so pages covered in his scrawl, gibberish to most, but for him, it represented the most important work Tony Stark would ever do, driven , not by fame, but the need to make things right. He wanted to close his eyes and not see her tear-stained face or hear her tortured cries.

_Tony, make it stop!_

Tony worked furiously until his hand cramped around the pencil it held. He had no idea how much time had passed. He slumped back against his chair, rubbing his hand. There were ten floors of R&amp;D space in the new Tower, but he chose to confine his work to one corner of the master bedroom. Here he could work _and _watch Pepper. Rising with a sigh, Tony made his way to the bathroom. Once inside, he ran the sink full of cold water. Tony splashed his face repeatedly and stared at his reflection in the mirror. Maybe it was time he admitted he couldn't do this alone. He made Pepper a promise. He'd even made his boasts that he was a mechanic and fixing things was what he did. Who cares what else he could create if he couldn't fix the _one thing_ that actually mattered? The list of people capable of helping him was short. The list of whom he would trust to work on fixing Pepper was even shorter. At this moment, it consisted of exactly one person. Bruce was certainly smart enough to understand the scientific aspects of what was going on. He also understood how much Pepper meant to him. If he couldn't get this thing figured out, maybe he could get Bruce to talk to Pepper. Of everyone, _he_ would know how to help her keep everything under control. "Okay," he said to the face staring back at him. "You have _completely_ lost it if you're considering getting anger management tips from the _Hulk_." Tony wet his face again before draining the sink. He patted it dry with a nearby towel and gave himself one more look. Pepper wasn't depending on Bruce or anyone else. In her greatest hour of need, she hadn't called out for her parents or God or even Iron Man. Pepper called _him_.

_Tony, make it stop!_

Suddenly, Tony was too tired to work any more. If he were fortunate, he would get _some_ rest before the dream came. He crawled into bed beside Pepper. There _had_ to be something he was missing. As he lay there, he began to go over the formula in his head, line-by-line. Just as he was about to doze off, he thought of the smudged writing on the name tag and the two equations he'd written when he was drunk. Those two were the only way it could _possibly_... He stopped himself mid-thought. _Were_ there two? Tony tossed back the covers and practically leaped out of the bed. He rifled through the stuff on the desk until he found the tag from the Bern conference. "I didn't write it down!" He grabbed his notebook and searched for the correct page. Instead of the two equations he _thought_ he copied into the formula, there was only one. "That's why it worked in my head and not on paper," he muttered to himself. Tearing a page from the back of the notebook, he plugged in the forgotten part. "That's it! You were a miserable, forgetful drunk, Stark."

"Tony?" Pepper called groggily from the bed. "Are you alright?"

"Absolutely," he confidently replied. "In a little while, you will be, too. I found it."

"Found what?" She sat up in bed, still puzzled by what he meant.

"You'll see," he said before bounding out of the room.

**Author's note: So...there is chapter one. Is it worth more following chapters? I recently watched IM3 again and it is chock-full of story ideas. IDK how many chapters this will evolve into, but, I think it's going to be interesting. I just hope you all feel the same way. :) Special thanks to my BFF for helping me frame out the original storyline, and to nancyozz and starkind for their input. Reviews are wanted and welcome (especially to gauge interest for future chapters). PEPPERONY FOREVER!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Redemption**

Chapter 2

Pepper watched Tony dash out of the bedroom. He wasn't gone very long before she wished he would return. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she took the pillow from his side of the bed and hugged it to her. She didn't like being separated from Tony. The last time, bad things happened. She could feel the familiar tightening in her chest. She _would not_ panic, however. Pepper Potts did not panic. "Look at your surroundings," she reminded herself. "You're home. You're in your own bed. You are safe. You're not…_there_ anymore." Pepper buried her nose in the pillow and inhaled deeply. It was saturated with various Tony smells: cologne, shampoo, body wash. It was nothing at all like the stale, sour smells of the Miami harbor. Just thinking about it made her want to retch. But, she wasn't there. These were the scents of comfort and of home.

Since she had no idea when Tony would be back, Pepper considered trying to sleep. All that stopped her was the fear of the dreams returning when he wouldn't be there to make them stop. In her dreams, she was _there_ again, bound down and helpless. There were machines, monitors, and people all around, but she never felt more alone. Tony wasn't there. _He_ was there, though, Aldrich Killian, leering at her. There was on odd, hungry look in his eyes like a wolf drooling over a wounded lamb. He stuck the first needle in her arm personally, smiling at her every gasp and whimper. Then, the pain started. The slow, steady burn began in her veins and spread throughout her body. She didn't know how long it continued before it became absolutely unbearable. Pepper felt as if she was cooking from the inside out. So, she called for the only person she knew could help.

_Tony, make it stop!_

This is the point in the dream where she usually woke up. The first few times were the worst. Those nights, Pepper wouldn't let Tony touch her for fear she would burn him. She even went as far as to try to sleep in the bathtub, where she thought it would be safest for everyone concerned. Then Tony stepped in, saying he didn't care if he had to wear an asbestos bodysuit, he wasn't letting her do this to herself. That night, she cried herself to sleep in his arms, tears soaking his shirt as she poured out her heart. The fear was palpable. Fear she would die. Fear she would be like this forever. Fear she would hurt the one person she would rather _die_ than hurt. Tony listened to every sob and tearful word, stroking her hair and kissing her forehead. Pepper apologized for not being more understanding of what he'd gone through after New York. She knew now what he must've experienced. There wasn't an "I told you so" to be heard. Tony simply held her closer and said he would go through it all again if it meant being able to help her. He promised to find a way to fix this. He would find a way to cure the Extremis. From that time on, whenever the dreams came, he was there, drying her tears and assuring her everything would be alright.

There were also times like tonight, when it wasn't merely a dream from which she could awaken, but more like a living nightmare. Pepper knew how hard Tony was working, so she hid the panic attacks the best she could. She knew _why_ he was working as hard as he was, going without sleep and living off of triple espresso and Red Bull. She had put enough on him without him having to drop it all when she freaked out. _These_ she would deal with herself. "You're not there. You're safe. Tony is here. Tony will fix you." This would have been more convincing if she were actually able to see him. While in her mind Pepper knew Tony was somewhere in the building, it wasn't the same. Despite all she told herself, she could feel her body start to warm. "J.A.R.V.I.S.?" she spoke to the empty room.

"Yes, Miss Potts?"

"Where's Tony?"

"Mr. Stark initiated the 'Do Not Disturb' protocol and…"

"He didn't mean by me."

"Furthermore, you are to rest. I am to allow you to…"

"Where _is_ he, J.A.R.V.I.S?!"

"I'm afraid I cannot…"

"Forget it!" Pepper began to sweat. She refused to look at her hands and arms for fear of seeing the dreaded orange glow. She knew she didn't have much time before it turned into a full-blown panic attack…or worse. She did not need pre-programmed answers from a digitized voice. She needed Tony. Tossing aside the pillow, she crawled off the bed. "I will find him myself." Making her way down the maze of hallways leading to his new lab, Pepper could only form one request.

_Tony, make it stop!_

**Author's note: ****This chapter pretty much wrote itself, so I was able to update pretty quickly. Thanks to everyone for the response to Ch. 1. You guys are great. Thanks to nancyozz and my BFF for their support and help. I hope you like it enough to keep following. I'm not sure how many more chapters there will be, but I'm thinking two or three. Reviews would be AWESOME! It may help Chapter 3 come quicker. :) Let me know if you're still interested. PEPPERONY FOREVER!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Redemption**

Chapter 3

The huge plexiglass sheets along the walls of the lab were covered in numbers, symbols, and letters. Until ten minutes ago, they were practically useless. But that was ten minutes ago. Tony stepped back to survey his additions, a satisfied smile on his face. Everything fit. It worked, at least on paper. Because of who it involved, he would check, double-check, even bazillion-check if need be to make sure. Pepper trusted him and he _would not_ let her down. He'd ran out of the bedroom without the notebook containing the rest of the formula, which he would need for those bazillion-checks. He was walking out the door when he heard J.A.R.V.I.S.' warning.

"Sir, Miss Potts is..."

The end of the message was missed because of the collision. Tony ran head-on into Pepper. She practically walked into his arms. Her skin was hot to the touch, letting him know everything was definitely _not_ okay. He saw the fear in her eyes confirming his suspicion. "Honey, what is it?"

Pepper looked helplessly at her hands and arms. "Make...make it stop." She pressed her face into his neck. "Tony, _please_ make it stop," she repeated.

"I'm trying," he said, wrapping his arms around her. "I promise, it will be over soon." He stood and held her for the longest time, waiting for her body to calm itself. "That's why I left the bedroom. Is that what made you...upset? Because I left? I was coming back. I wouldn't leave you."

"I know, but I...I started to panic. I asked J.A.R.V.I.S. where you were and he said you couldn't be disturbed. I _needed_ you and I was trying to find you."

"You did," Tony consoled. "You found me." He peeked at what skin he could see and noticed it returning to its normal shade. The heat was subsiding. He could feel it against his throat. He moved his hands slowly up and down her back in slow, comforting strokes. "You should go back to bed."

Pepper shook her head. "I don't want to dream again."

"But, you need to rest."

"I need to be here...with you."

"I have to go get something I left in the apartment." He felt Pepper tighten her grip. Tony kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry," he muttered into her hair, "but, it's important. I need to make sure all my calculations are correct before..." He felt a hot tear leave her cheek and roll onto his neck. She didn't care about formulas and equations. All she cared about was being with him. All _he_ cared about was taking care of her. "Okay. Change of plans. _We_ go back to the apartment. I look for what I need and you tell me what's going on."

Pepper gave him one last hug before letting go. She pulled back to look at Tony and gave him a shy smile, dashing away her tears with the back of her hand. Tony kissed the end of her nose and took her by the hand, leading the way out of the lab.

* * *

"How long?" Tony asked. They were back in their bedroom where Pepper was sitting cross-legged on the bed while he sorted through his research.

"How long what?"

"The panic attacks. That's not the first one was it?"

"No."

"So...how long have you been having them?" Pepper toyed with the edge of the pillowcase beside her but didn't say anything. "Since Miami?" He looked over his shoulder and saw her nod . "And you didn't tell me because..."

"You have a lot on your mind."

"Nothing more important than taking care of you."

"You work night and day and...it's all my fault."

Tony laid the papers he'd been holding on the table and joined Pepper on the bed. "There is a lot of people at fault and _tons _of blame to go around. There's about 12 ways it's _my_ fault. I threatened a terrorist. I left you alone. I put you in harm's way. Killian. Maya. They wouldn't have been a factor if it wasn't for me. So, blame me. Blame him. Blame her. But _none_ of this, in any shape or form, is your fault."

"You're busy with all this," Pepper said, waving at the paperwork scattered around. "Since I don't do science, I thought I could help best by dealing with the panicking on my own."

"Kinda like me thinking that since you were busy running the company, I thought I could help best by preparing for the worst?"

"Something like that."

"Except you did stuff like doing yoga breathing exercises in the bathroom. I built 35 suits of armor and stored them under our basement." This coaxed a small laugh out of his girlfriend. "I learned the hard way that trying to hide it does no good."

"I don't like not being in control."

Tony moved to sit beside Pepper, wrapping his arms around her. She responded by laying her head on his shoulder. "It's okay. That's just who you are."

"A control freak?"

"No. Not exactly."

"Not exactly?" Pepper asked, raising her head.

Tony guided her head back onto his shoulder. "Not exactly a control freak. You're used to being the one taking care of stuff. You're a…a 'manager.' You planned and managed my life. You run a company. It's your nature. This is one problem you can't organize away and it's driving you nuts."

"So, now you're the manager?"

"Temporarily."

"You mean you don't want this to be a permanent role reversal?"

"Uh...no. As you can see, organization has never been my strong suit." Tony ran his fingers through her hair. "But, for you...I'll do it as long as it takes."

"Any idea how long that will be?"

"Sooner than later. I know it's not what you want to hear, but..."

"No. It's...it's fine. I trust you." Pepper looked at the mess that was Tony's workstation. How he managed to find _anything_ was beyond her. She would have gone completely berserk trying to maneuver around it all. "I don't see how you do it."

"Well, it helps that I'm a genius."

"Not _that_, Mr. Modesty. I don't see how you work in all that...squalor," she finished, unable to find a better word.

"I prefer to think of it as organized chaos," Tony defended. "That's what I've got you for, remember? You bring order to my chaos."

"I don't think even _I_ can help that." Pepper sat silently for a while, enjoying the feeling of Tony's arms around her. "Have you heard from Happy?"

"This afternoon."

"How is he?"

"Being pampered by his private nurse and binge-watching British television."

"But, he's going to be..."

"He's going to be fine. By the time we get back, he'll be using words like 'brolly' and eating scones every day for high tea." Pepper yawned and settled further against his shoulder. Tony remembered he'd roused them both from what had been passing for rest. "Those things are contagious, you know," he said through a yawn of his own. He released her with a kiss. "I'm tired." Pepper began to get off the bed. "Don't even think about going far. You can go as far as the other side of the bed, but that's just until I can get these covers straightened out." Tony gave her his most charming smile. "I'm _not_ sleeping alone. You don't get a choice."

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it."

Tony busied himself with rearranging the sheets and comforter. When he finished, he slid between them and patted the empty place beside him. Pepper needed no further invitation. Tony was lying on his side, so she lay her head on his outstretched arm. With a hand on her belly, he pulled her against him. Pepper interlocked the fingers of her right hand with his left hand that was near her face. "What if…"

"Shh. Don't. Just rest." Tony felt Pepper relax. It wasn't long before her deep, even breathing told him she was asleep. One last time, he kissed her hair and closed his eyes. Tony knew she couldn't hear him, but he had something to tell her before he drifted to sleep himself. "Sweet dreams, Pepper."

**Author's note: Finally...I have managed to get this story updated. I apologize for the delay. Real life has been throwing some heavy stuff my way lately, but, usually, that results in more writing inspiration. Maybe this will end up being a good thing. :-) I'm forever indebted to my BFF for keeping me going and her unwavering faith in me. Thanks so much to nancyozz for her input and support. It means so much. Let me know how you like this chapter. Reviews are wanted and welcomed. I promise the next update will be sooner. I hope you like it. Again, I apologize for taking so long. Thank you for your patience. Happy reading and PEPPERONY FOREVER!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Redemption**

Chapter 4

Pepper was usually the first to awaken. On the mornings when she wasn't, she enjoyed the various ways Tony used to rouse her. However, this morning, arouse would be a better word to use. His hands were roaming all over her, above and beneath clothing. As if to distract her from that, his lips began feasting on her neck and throat. Somewhere in the far-off corners of her mind was an idea that they should stop, but Pepper was enjoying this too much to even suggest stopping. For some reason, it seemed like ages since they had been intimate and part of her seemed to crave his touch. She didn't try to stop the satisfied moan that escaped.

"Good morning," Tony whispered into her ear.

"It is now." She felt Tony smile against her skin. For once, she would gladly feed his ego if it would encourage him to continue his current activities. Tony used his hands on her waist to maneuver Pepper onto her back before placing a long kiss on her mouth. At that particular moment, she couldn't remember the last time he'd kissed her. She wanted more...more kisses, more touches, more Tony. By now, he was stretched out on top of her. Pepper took a fistful of t-shirt in each hand and dragged the cloth up his back. They came apart long enough for Tony to pull the shirt off over his head and toss it away. The second kiss was more passionate than the first. Pepper threaded her fingers in Tony's hair, pulling him closer. When this kiss ended, she wasn't ready to relinquish the closeness. She massaged his scalp slowly while placing open-mouthed kisses of her own along his jaw.

"Oh...my...god," Tony groaned. "You are so hot."

The last word echoed in her head like an explosion. Hot...Fire...Extremis. Her hands stilled. That was what the niggling feeling in the back of her mind was trying to tell her. Suddenly, it all came back. It _had_ been a long time since they'd been intimate or since she'd even allowed Tony to kiss her. She _couldn't_, no matter how badly she wanted it. She was still too dangerous. "Tony..."

Tony had taken her stopping as his clue to start. "Hmm?" he answered lazily.

"We...we have to stop."

"I don't know if I can," he replied, before beginning to nibble on her ear.

"I'm serious."

"So am I."

Pepper removed her hands from his hair and, putting them on either side of his face, pulled Tony's head up to look him eye-to-eye. "I want this. I _need_ this...more than I could ever tell, but, we can't. Not yet."

"We could _try_."

"No," Pepper said with a shake of her head. "We don't know what may happen."

"I'm willing to risk it."

"I'm not."

"C'mon...what's the point of science if you can't experiment?" Tony tried to ease the tension with his most disarming smile.

"There is a really good possibility that things could get, um, out of hand and I could hurt you." She stroked the cheek she'd been kissing moments earlier. "I couldn't live with myself if that happened."

Tony sighed. "If Aldrich Killian wasn't already dead, I would kill him."

Pepper smiled sympathetically. "For a minute, I completely forgot anything was wrong. Everything felt so normal and right." She stroked his cheek again. "I'm sorry."

"What _can_ we do?"

"I do think we would be pretty safe with a good morning kiss." He kissed her. The longer it lasted, the more her resolve wilted. Maybe Tony was right. Maybe they _could_ try. It was getting harder and harder to form a reason why they couldn't throw caution to the wind and let him finish what he started. The need to breathe was the only thing that forced them to break the kiss.

Tony propped himself up on his elbows and looked at Pepper a long minute while he caught his breath. "I'm not so sure that was a good idea," he admitted.

"I'm definitely sure it wasn't a _bad_ idea."

"So, one more would be..."

"An even better idea." As he closed the gap between them, Pepper made up her mind. She wasn't going to stop or make Tony stop until it became absolutely necessary. She would do whatever she could to make it last as long as possible. Tony's lips left her mouth and began another journey down her neck, causing her to shiver. "Please don't make him have to stop now," she muttered under her breath.

"What?"

"Keep doing what you're doing." By now, Tony was licking his way across her collarbone. She could feel her body begin to warm. Through the fog in her mind, Pepper remembered she was wearing the black sports bra. That may work to keep her cool a _little_ longer. She pushed Tony away far enough to allow her to remove her top and heard him growl before picking up where he left off. She knew time was growing short. She squeezed her eyes shut, purposefully avoiding looking at the skin she knew was growing brighter by the minute.

Tony held out as long as he could, continuing his caresses until the heat was more than he could bear, even in his turned-on state. He rolled over to his side of the bed, flopping onto his back with a frustrated sigh. "Okay. I'm taking care of this _today_."

Pepper sat up and pushed her hair back. She drew a ragged breath. "I'm going to take a cold shower and when I get out..."

"Maybe _that_ would work." Tony mused, staring at the ceiling.

"What?"

"We haven't tried it."

"Tried _what_?"

"Maybe we should."

"_What_ haven't we tried that maybe we should?"

"Using a cold shower. That way, when things started heating up, the water could put out the fire."

Despite the gravity of the situation, Pepper laughed. "I don't think that would be wise."

"Why not?"

"What if it didn't work? _I_ am the one with the ability to regenerate lost body parts. If something happened to Antonio..."

"Point taken."

"We don't want that."

"Nope. We must protect Antonio at all costs."

"Yes we do. I have grown rather fond of Antonio."

"_You're_ fond of him..." Tony sat up slowly. "I will be in the lab working feverishly. Will you be okay?"

"I'll be fine," Pepper assured him. "Go...and I promise, the next one, you can take with me."

"I suddenly seem to have found extra motivation."

Pepper watched Tony grab his shirt from the floor and put it on while walking out the door. She stared longingly at his retreating backside. "Me, too," she said with certainty "Me, too."

**Author's notes: If anything good can come out of illness, I guess this chapter is it. I spent last week in bed with strep throat and the flu. While I felt horrible, it gave me extra time to finish up this chapter. It was something new for me, "non-sex near-smut,"as it came to be called. My BFF and nancyozz were great, putting up with an even "touchier-than-normal" me. You guys are great! Starkind, as always, I appreciate your honest evaluations. :) I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Despite the fact that it was something different for me, I actually found writing the "near-smut" fun. Reviews are wanted and welcomed. PLEASE let me know what you think. Happy reading and PEPPERONY FOREVER!**


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